A Short Story for Mei

"Don't get too tired..."

"Thanks for caring me darlin'"

"My pleasure my dear..."

I feel like I'm too young saying the latest line. But I just let go, meski cuma di "R" dan tidak ada pesan selanjutnya. Rarely saja rasanya. Kemarin-kemarin hobinya berlalu. Reading that 'thanks' made all my efforts and most of them disappointment worthwhile. Like I could not ask for more, even 'sorry' for what has been done through. I remember his similar text, far away last year's January.

"I love to stare at your tired face..."

I supposed to text him that, I didn't. Just too afraid I might sound too drama atau dibuat-buat. Meski sebenarnya memang seperti itu. I could wait to see his pale face, sort of emptiness in his sight tapi masih ada sisa tenaga untuk sekedar membalas senyumku. Then I remember again the early days, used to send him 'safe flight, may the weather calm itself for you'. Padahal cuma alasan biar bisa tahu kabar dan di ujung chat berdebar-debar menunggu ia mengirimkan icon kiss ditambah 'for your eyebrow'. Missing those times desperately.

And sometimes I'm losing him. But as Dr Seuss said, don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened. Today, like Sam smiled secretly after reading Charlie's Christmas card, I can't stop staring at my cellphone.